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Befriending the Unwanted Within

Live Online Course

October 18th, 2026 - November 8th, 2026

Meet the full spectrum of who you are with clarity and compassion

We all carry parts of ourselves we would rather not have – the impulse for revenge, the sting of resentment, the pull of greed, the subtle arrogance that colors our thoughts.

These are not signs of failure, but what the Buddha described as stains on the cloth of our heart-minds: real, consequential, and (with the right tools) workable.

Drawing on the Buddha’s “Simile of the Cloth” and other classical teachings from the Pali Canon, this month-long course with insight meditation teacher Ulla Koenig offers a structured, compassionate journey into the inner shadows most of us avoid.

At the heart of the course is a middle path, grounded in the Buddha’s invitation of non-identification: these patterns are not who we are. And yet they are real, in the sense that they shape our own well-being and the well-being of those around us.

Together, we’ll explore difficult inner dynamics – malicious joy and revenge, resentment and ill will, pride and arrogance, and greed and chronic lack – and learn to meet them with clarity rather than self-judgment, denial, or shame.

Join this 4-week journey with Ulla to receive:

  • A practical framework for working with inner shadows: a clear, Buddha-based model for approaching difficult emotions without over-identification or over-reaction.
  • Concrete meditation and reflection tools: specific practices to work with shadow dynamics, including developing a helpful distance to inner dynamics, compassionate acknowledgment and how to develop an authentic sense of gratitude, that you can integrate into your ongoing daily practice.
  • Inquiry into a more stable, dignified sense of self: we will distinguish a healthy self-worth from harmful pride and chronic lack and learn to develop confidence in an inner compass of integrity, which makes us less reactive to criticism, comparison, and the eight worldly winds.

This course is suitable for meditators who have some experience with mindfulness practice and want to bring it into the territory of shadow and ethical self-awareness.

Please note: The material involves honest self-reflection and inquiry into difficult emotional terrain. Participants who are in active psychological crisis or trauma processing are encouraged to seek additional therapeutic support alongside this program.

Module 1 - Malicious Joy & the Urge for Revenge

Cupped hands holding a smooth dark stone in a sunlit meadow

In our opening session together, Ulla takes us into two closely related shadow dynamics:

The quiet satisfaction at another’s misfortune, and the impulse toward payback and retaliation.

We’ll explore what drives these patterns – an unmet sense of justice, a wounded self-worth – and practice meeting the underlying hurt with compassion rather than acting it outward. The goal is not suppression, but honest, curious, and caring attention.

Module 2 - Resentment, Ill Will & the Spectrum of Anger

A campfire burnt down to glowing embers in a ring of stones at dusk

Not all anger is unskillful. There is healthy anger that signals crossed boundaries and unmet needs.

Anger, resentment, aggression, and hatred form a spectrum our third session explores with nuance and care.

We’ll learn to distinguish this from resentment that festers, aggression that harms, and hatred that erodes empathy. And three skillful steps – compassionate acknowledgment, wise expression, and grieving dukkha – are offered by Ulla as practical tools.

Module 3 - Pride, Arrogance & Healthy Self-Worth

A lone oak in strong wind, its leaves streaming sideways while the trunk stays still

Few things wear us down like a sense of worth that rises with praise and falls with criticism, always measured against someone else.

In our third week together, we focus on the spectrum from healthy dignity to harmful pride (māna), and the distinction between authentic appreciation (muditā) and superiority-based self-worth.

Ulla will guide us in exploring what a stable, unconditional sense of dignity feels like – one not shaken by criticism, comparison, or the eight worldly winds.

Module 4 - Greed, Chronic Lack & the Middle Way of Needs

Cupped hands brimming with clear water from a mossy stone spout

Our final session investigates the Buddha’s teaching on lobha – greed and craving – and its hidden form, chronic lack – the sense that there is never quite enough, no matter what we gather or achieve.

We practice distinguishing genuine human needs, which can be met and satisfied, from the restless pull of wanting-more, which cannot.

Appreciation and gratitude are offered as liberating practices that bring the course to a gentle, grounded close.

Praise for Ulla's Teaching

“Ulla has an amazing ability to integrate the Dharma with modern psychological understanding. She has helped me with translating what is in the teachings into the real lived experience in our western lives.”

“I find refuge and learning in Ulla’s courses. For me, she combines study of suttas with a warm heart and deep understanding of the complexity of being human and how to act well in the world.”

“Ulla is a wonderful, wise and heart-felt teacher. She creates such a safe and compassionate space for learning and self-exploration. I have gained so much, both personally and professionally from accessing her teachings.”

“I have deeply valued Ulla’s insights and compassionate presence in online courses as well as personal sessions with her over the last few years. Whether in the context of navigating through personal crises or longer-term efforts to integrate practice into ‘real’ daily life, she has offered sensitive listening, mirroring, a fine attunement to relational ethics, a sense of humor, and the ability to share her own wisdom in a genuinely humble manner — a rare combination in the field.”

Live Online Course Details

Live Interactive Sessions

Ulla will lead our weekly Sunday sessions, to include guided meditation, contemplative inquiry, and practices of self-reflection to develop a more grounded, resilient, and compassionate relationship with the full spectrum of human experience. Each class will also include time to ask questions and receive support from Ulla.

Daily Reflection Practices

Each week, Ulla will offer reflective journaling exercises along with a sitting meditation and inquiry practice to deepen the week's teachings, to be completed for 20-30 minutes each day (or as often as your schedule allows). These invitations are embedded in the course material and meant to be carried into daily life informally.

Community Connections

Your journey will be in community with other practitioners around the world via our interactive course platform. As you move through each module, course guides will facilitate discussions, answer questions, and provide resources and support.

Lifetime Access

All teachings, meditations and Q&A's will be recorded, published and archived on our interactive course platform. Video recordings will be permanently available for you to come back to as many times as you like in the future.

Schedule

Photo - Alarm Clock - Schedule

Dates & Times

Module 1: Sunday, October 18, 2026 8:00 am PDT / 11:00 am EDT / 4:00 pm BST / 5:00 pm CEST (90 mins)

Module 2: Sunday, October 25, 2026 9:00 am PDT / 12:00 pm EDT / 4:00 pm GMT / 5:00 pm CET (90 mins)

Module 3: Sunday, November 1, 2026 8:00 am PST / 11:00 am EST / 4:00 pm GMT / 5:00 pm CET (90 mins)

Module 4: Sunday, November 8, 2026 8:00 am PST / 11:00 am EST / 4:00 pm GMT / 5:00 pm CET (90 mins)

Replays will be posted in the days afterwards for those who cannot attend live.

About Ulla Koenig

Ulla Koenig is a mindfulness and meditation teacher in the Vipassana tradition. She teaches insight meditation retreats in various centres in Germany as well as in social institutions and prisons. She works with social activists, refugees, people with special needs, cancer patients and others. Being authorized as Dharma Teacher by Christopher Titmuss, she explores the depths of the original Buddhist texts to give support for our day to day life. A mother of two and former project manager, she lives in Southern Germany. Click here to learn more about Ulla Koenig.