Use code SUMMERPRACTICE for a 25% discount on all On Demand Courses through August 31.

The Dharma and the Drama of Sex: Everything you Wanted to know about Dharma and Sex but were too Spiritual to Ask

With Martin Aylward recorded on November 18, 2018.

Found our teachings useful? Help us continue our work and support your teachers with a donation. Here’s how.

Sex is everywhere. It’s how we got born, it teases us from advertising boards on every city street, it drives some of the biggest industries, and it provokes some of the most intense stimuli in body, heart and mind.

Yet dharma teachings, even in a lay context, mostly ignore sex. It is not spoken about enough, and Buddhism, like most other religions, usually defaults to either celibacy or long term monogamy as the only possibilities for wise sexual relationship. This is poor guidance and ignores the potency of sexual energy, the intensity of sexual desire, and the vital need to wake up around sex.

Meanwhile, we have a long, depressing and seemingly ever-growing list of Buddhist figureheads involved in sexual scandals, abuses and betrayals of trust. You cannot expect wise teachings on sexuality from (mostly male) teachers who can’t behave wisely, respectfully, or even consensually, in their own sex lives. And while Buddha has wise guidance on many things, would you go for advice on sex and relationship to a 2500 year old celibate Indian guy who ran away from his wife and called his son ‘Chain around my ankle’?

In this session, Martin explores the dharma and drama of sex. We look away from orthodoxy and tradition and towards 21st century life; exploring sexual history and desire, consent and conditioning, various forms of skilful sexual relationship, and a healthy approach to Tantra.

Listen to the audio version below, or click here to download the mp3.

Discussion

Leave a Reply

Discover more from the Dharma Library

  • Dave Smith

    Mindfulness and the Four Noble Truths

    Across all Buddhist lineages and traditions, the four noble truths hold the utmost importance. They are the Dharma’s most fundamental teaching. In modern society, the focus of Buddhism often shifts to meditation, particularly mindfulness, as the practice continues to be integrated into contemporary culture. How can we bring the teachings of the four noble truths…

    Read More

  • Cultivating self-compassion

    So many of us struggle with self-hatred and self-judgment. Self-compassion is so deeply needed in these times, and brings together mindfulness, loving kindness practices, and a recognition of our shared humanity. This session explores the cultivation of this core set of practices.

    Read More

  • Brian Dean Williams

    Wild Awake: The Wisdom of Nature

    In the story of the Buddha, he awakened in the forest, taught in the forest, died in the forest. Nature played an important role in the Buddha’s awakening. Many Buddhist practice communities have been in close connection with nature. What role might it play in our practice here in the modern world? In this session…

    Read More

  • photo of Martin Aylward smiling

    Light on the path: pleasure, joy, fulfilment and free-ness.

    Our founding and guiding teacher Martin Aylward reflects on the importance of being nourished and uplifted by our practice. He looks at the nature of happiness and our sometimes difficult relationship with pleasure; explore opening up to joy, and point to ways in which dharma practice is fulfilling and freeing.

    Read More

  • Eugene Cash

    The Paradox of Being: Alive & Aware

    “The World is its Own Magic” – Suzuki Roshi As we practice and our understanding deepens, we’re often surprised by paradox. We begin to discover what the Laṅkāvatāra Sutra pointed to: Things are not what they seem… Nor are they otherwise. We intuitively know that there is more to life/reality then the usual, the familiar…

    Read More

  • Nikki-Mirghafori

    Equanimity: Crown Jewel of Buddhist Practice

    What is equanimity, and how does it differ from indifference? What different forms and subtleties of equanimity are presented in various Buddhist teachings, often occupying the prestigious last spot on the lists? How does equanimity relate to love and compassion? For what reasons should one pursue the development of equanimity for one’s own benefit, the…

    Read More