Use code SUMMERPRACTICE for a 25% discount on all On Demand Courses through August 31.

The Dharma and the Drama of Sex: Everything you Wanted to know about Dharma and Sex but were too Spiritual to Ask

With Martin Aylward recorded on November 18, 2018.

Found our teachings useful? Help us continue our work and support your teachers with a donation. Here’s how.

Sex is everywhere. It’s how we got born, it teases us from advertising boards on every city street, it drives some of the biggest industries, and it provokes some of the most intense stimuli in body, heart and mind.

Yet dharma teachings, even in a lay context, mostly ignore sex. It is not spoken about enough, and Buddhism, like most other religions, usually defaults to either celibacy or long term monogamy as the only possibilities for wise sexual relationship. This is poor guidance and ignores the potency of sexual energy, the intensity of sexual desire, and the vital need to wake up around sex.

Meanwhile, we have a long, depressing and seemingly ever-growing list of Buddhist figureheads involved in sexual scandals, abuses and betrayals of trust. You cannot expect wise teachings on sexuality from (mostly male) teachers who can’t behave wisely, respectfully, or even consensually, in their own sex lives. And while Buddha has wise guidance on many things, would you go for advice on sex and relationship to a 2500 year old celibate Indian guy who ran away from his wife and called his son ‘Chain around my ankle’?

In this session, Martin explores the dharma and drama of sex. We look away from orthodoxy and tradition and towards 21st century life; exploring sexual history and desire, consent and conditioning, various forms of skilful sexual relationship, and a healthy approach to Tantra.

Listen to the audio version below, or click here to download the mp3.

Discussion

Leave a Reply

Discover more from the Dharma Library

  • Emily Horn

    The Phases of Insight

    Similar to the phases of the moon, our spiritual practice is full of natural rhythms and seasons. In this session we will learn a simple chart, called the phases of insight, that supports recognizing what can unfold at various points in meditation. By learning these patterns we can open our hearts with more confidence, and attune to…

    Read More

  • photo of Martin Aylward smiling

    The nature of experience. Part 2: Emptiness.

    Today’s session is the second in a special run of three consecutive sessions with Martin, where he looks deeply at the nature of experience through Buddha’s profound descriptions of reality – Impermanence, Emptiness, Non self-existence. The classes point directly to how these themes can come alive in our practice and understanding, looking at the personal,…

    Read More

  • Daily Meditation Recordings, with Ulla Koenig – Week of June 17, 2024

    This week’s theme is “Preparing the Heart and Mind”. In Buddhist practice we often hear we should let go. And often enough we would really like to let go of those thoughts, impulses, moods and contractions which keep us agitated and in unease. But letting go is rarely something we decide to do; and neither is holding on. In the upcoming week we will explore why the heart-mind holds on to something and how we can prepare, nourish and soothe it, so that letting go becomes a natural process, not a willful command.

    Read More

  • Willa Blythe Baker

    The Wisdom of the Body

    While we might think of the body as flesh and blood, there is so much more to this mortal coil. The body in fact may be our deepest teacher. In this session, we explore how to listen to the wisdom of the body and realize its potential to guide us to groundedness, self-honesty, presence and wisdom.

    Read More

  • Pamela Weiss

    Living by Vow

    To live by vow is a radical reorientation – from reactivity to response-ability, and from fear to love. This session will examine what it means to walk the spiritual path, and consider the importance of inspiration, aspiration and aligned, appropriate action. Together we will explore the tenderness and power of meeting the world from what…

    Read More

  • Daily Meditation Recordings, with Ayala Gill – Week of March 18, 2024

    This week’s topic is “Love’s Flavours and Flow”. Love never leaves us. It’s already here in each thought, sight, taste, smell, sound, sensation and movement. Love is already here, resting beside each pain, celebrating each delight and expanding into the great unknown with infinite patience and warmth. Love effortlessly flows into giving and receiving, and mysteriously radiates in wordless Being. Love’s presence is known in the moment we choose to recognise, allow and participate in the dance of its ongoing flavours and flow.

    Read More