Use code SUMMERPRACTICE for a 25% discount on all On Demand Courses through August 31.

The Dharma and the Drama of Sex: Everything you Wanted to know about Dharma and Sex but were too Spiritual to Ask

With Martin Aylward recorded on November 18, 2018.

Found our teachings useful? Help us continue our work and support your teachers with a donation. Here’s how.

Sex is everywhere. It’s how we got born, it teases us from advertising boards on every city street, it drives some of the biggest industries, and it provokes some of the most intense stimuli in body, heart and mind.

Yet dharma teachings, even in a lay context, mostly ignore sex. It is not spoken about enough, and Buddhism, like most other religions, usually defaults to either celibacy or long term monogamy as the only possibilities for wise sexual relationship. This is poor guidance and ignores the potency of sexual energy, the intensity of sexual desire, and the vital need to wake up around sex.

Meanwhile, we have a long, depressing and seemingly ever-growing list of Buddhist figureheads involved in sexual scandals, abuses and betrayals of trust. You cannot expect wise teachings on sexuality from (mostly male) teachers who can’t behave wisely, respectfully, or even consensually, in their own sex lives. And while Buddha has wise guidance on many things, would you go for advice on sex and relationship to a 2500 year old celibate Indian guy who ran away from his wife and called his son ‘Chain around my ankle’?

In this session, Martin explores the dharma and drama of sex. We look away from orthodoxy and tradition and towards 21st century life; exploring sexual history and desire, consent and conditioning, various forms of skilful sexual relationship, and a healthy approach to Tantra.

Listen to the audio version below, or click here to download the mp3.

Discussion

Leave a Reply

Discover more from the Dharma Library

  • James Baraz

    Changing the Channel: Opening to Goodness

    The barrage of frightening headlines often leaves us with feelings of despair, hopelessness, and negativity. While it’s important to feel connected to the suffering all around us, it is equally important to nourish ourselves by opening to the goodness in life–both inside and around us. Our caring can then be held with more spaciousness and…

    Read More

  • Daigan Gaither

    Bodhisattva Practice

    Using the hagiography of the Bodhisattvas of Compassion, Wisdom, and Activity, let’s explore how to bring those ideals into our everyday life off the cushion. What can these perfections of compassion, wisdom and activity teach us about our own journey to practice-realization, and liberation.

    Read More

  • Kaira Jewel Lingo

    Entering the flow of generosity: giving and receiving are one.

    In this class we explore the practice of generosity, both in giving and receiving. We investigate how we can give and receive from our heart, with wisdom and discernment. We learn how to allow the three kinds of gifts–material resources, the gift of the Dharma, and the gift of non-fear–to flow abundantly through all aspects…

    Read More

  • photo of Martin Aylward smiling

    Daily Meditation Recordings, with Martin Aylward – Week of June 15

    We’re fortunate that Martin Aylward has generously offered to lead our daily meditation sessions for Europe and the UK this week. To find out more about Martin, and view his other recordings on the platform, click here. Due to temporary circumstances there may be slight delays in uploading this week’s recordings. Thank you for your…

    Read More

  • Zohar Lavie

    Daily Meditation Recordings, with Zohar Lavie – Week of July 17, 2023

    This week’s topic is “Deepening and Developing Unconditional Friendliness”. Metta, translated as unconditional friendliness, is a powerful and transformative attitude. When we relate to ourselves, others and experience with metta, reactivity and ill being dissolve and wisdom and wellbeing grow. During this week of practice we will deepen the practice and application of metta, as well as the understanding of how it impacts experience.

    Read More

  • photo of Martin Aylward smiling

    Trust in the Goodness of your Practice

    Basic goodness is the fundamental ground of your own heart and mind and being. A buoyant heart allows us to face the ‘infinite ocean of suffering’ and stay open-hearted; It is the foundation for living the Bodhisattva vows, it is how we keep on waking up and showing up and growing up, for the benefit…

    Read More

  • Deborah Eden Tull - Senior Dharma Teacher

    Our sensitivity is our greatest strength.

    Being human is an inevitably vulnerable experience. The challenge lies in being taught that there is something wrong with us for feeling as sensitive and vulnerable as we do, We learn to cover up or numb out our sensitivity.Practice teaches us to turn towards, rather than away, from vulnerability, and allow it to affirm the…

    Read More

  • photo of Martin Aylward smiling

    Transforming the poisons.

    Buddha points out the three main ways we get pulled into activity and self-contraction – Greed, Hatred and Delusion – which Martin often translates as Desire, Defense and Distraction. This class explores creative ways of meeting these forces in everyday life, and explores powerful reflections for each of the three.

    Read More