Use code SUMMERPRACTICE for a 25% discount on all On Demand Courses through August 31.

The Dharma and the Drama of Sex: Everything you Wanted to know about Dharma and Sex but were too Spiritual to Ask

With Martin Aylward recorded on November 18, 2018.

Found our teachings useful? Help us continue our work and support your teachers with a donation. Here’s how.

Sex is everywhere. It’s how we got born, it teases us from advertising boards on every city street, it drives some of the biggest industries, and it provokes some of the most intense stimuli in body, heart and mind.

Yet dharma teachings, even in a lay context, mostly ignore sex. It is not spoken about enough, and Buddhism, like most other religions, usually defaults to either celibacy or long term monogamy as the only possibilities for wise sexual relationship. This is poor guidance and ignores the potency of sexual energy, the intensity of sexual desire, and the vital need to wake up around sex.

Meanwhile, we have a long, depressing and seemingly ever-growing list of Buddhist figureheads involved in sexual scandals, abuses and betrayals of trust. You cannot expect wise teachings on sexuality from (mostly male) teachers who can’t behave wisely, respectfully, or even consensually, in their own sex lives. And while Buddha has wise guidance on many things, would you go for advice on sex and relationship to a 2500 year old celibate Indian guy who ran away from his wife and called his son ‘Chain around my ankle’?

In this session, Martin explores the dharma and drama of sex. We look away from orthodoxy and tradition and towards 21st century life; exploring sexual history and desire, consent and conditioning, various forms of skilful sexual relationship, and a healthy approach to Tantra.

Listen to the audio version below, or click here to download the mp3.

Discussion

Leave a Reply

Discover more from the Dharma Library

  • Liberation Now: From the Progressive Path to Direct Experience

    In a progressive path approach to practice, we sometimes fall for the idea that liberation is in the future. We are conditioned to believe that we must end thinking, master practices, meditate for years, and purify our minds. Without realizing it, our beliefs can maintain the conditioning that stands in the way of our direct…

    Read More

  • Willa Blythe Baker

    The Wisdom of the Body

    While we might think of the body as flesh and blood, there is so much more to this mortal coil. The body in fact may be our deepest teacher. In this session, we explore how to listen to the wisdom of the body and realize its potential to guide us to groundedness, self-honesty, presence and wisdom.

    Read More

  • I Call on My Inherent Wellbeing

    In the territory of inherent health we are all equal. To really know this with the heartmind impacts our practice at all levels. One of the more important shifts in our practice is recognising the depth and sacredness of our shared humanity, goodness and nobility. 

    Read More

  • Nourishing Compassion

    His Holiness the Dalai Lama has shared that compassion is not a luxury but a necessity for human beings to survive. There is no more important time to understand and strengthen compassion than right now.

    Read More

  • Daily Meditation Recordings, with Ulla Koenig – Week of May 9, 2022

    This week’s topic is Disentangle the Net of Needs. We all have needs. Existential needs, needs for safety, connection, spirituality and much more. Our attitude towards needs, what strategies we choose to meet them and what boundaries we set in place determines to a large extent our happiness and peace of mind. In this week we want to explore skilful ways to handle our needs, feelings and boundaries. We will draw from Buddhist teachings, mindful practices and elements of non-violent communication to support us in our daily lives.

    Read More

  • Daily Meditation Recordings, with Christopher Titmuss – Week of 09 December, 2024

    We’re delighted to have Christopher Titmuss guiding our Daily Meditation sessions this week. May they support and deepen your practice.

    This week’s theme is: Liberation Of The Heart

    Join Christopher Titmuss for a week exploring the Brahma Viharas – the Immeasurable Ways of Being.

    The Brahma Viharas, traditionally known as Divine Abidings, point to something boundless in our human experience. While Brahma literally means “God,” its deeper root meaning is “Immeasurable.” The Buddha taught four specific ways to dwell in this immeasurable space: through radical love, compassion, appreciative joy, and equanimity.

    Over five morning sessions, Christopher will offer an overview of these teachings and explore each of these profound ways of abiding. By radical, we mean getting to the very root of what matters most.

    Whether you come with an open heart or a closed one, whether you’re new to meditation or a seasoned practitioner – all are welcome to join these transformative sessions.

    Our Dharma Library thrives through collective generosity. Your donation helps sustain this offering for our entire community.

    Read More