Use code SUMMERPRACTICE for a 25% discount on all On Demand Courses through August 31.

The Dharma and the Drama of Sex: Everything you Wanted to know about Dharma and Sex but were too Spiritual to Ask

With Martin Aylward recorded on November 18, 2018.

Found our teachings useful? Help us continue our work and support your teachers with a donation. Here’s how.

Sex is everywhere. It’s how we got born, it teases us from advertising boards on every city street, it drives some of the biggest industries, and it provokes some of the most intense stimuli in body, heart and mind.

Yet dharma teachings, even in a lay context, mostly ignore sex. It is not spoken about enough, and Buddhism, like most other religions, usually defaults to either celibacy or long term monogamy as the only possibilities for wise sexual relationship. This is poor guidance and ignores the potency of sexual energy, the intensity of sexual desire, and the vital need to wake up around sex.

Meanwhile, we have a long, depressing and seemingly ever-growing list of Buddhist figureheads involved in sexual scandals, abuses and betrayals of trust. You cannot expect wise teachings on sexuality from (mostly male) teachers who can’t behave wisely, respectfully, or even consensually, in their own sex lives. And while Buddha has wise guidance on many things, would you go for advice on sex and relationship to a 2500 year old celibate Indian guy who ran away from his wife and called his son ‘Chain around my ankle’?

In this session, Martin explores the dharma and drama of sex. We look away from orthodoxy and tradition and towards 21st century life; exploring sexual history and desire, consent and conditioning, various forms of skilful sexual relationship, and a healthy approach to Tantra.

Listen to the audio version below, or click here to download the mp3.

Discussion

Leave a Reply

Discover more from the Dharma Library

  • Emily Horn

    Intuitive Wisdom and Embodied Love

    “From my own experience, there is no difference between mindfulness and loving kindness. When you are fully loving, aren’t you also mindful? When you are mindful, is this not also the essence of love?” – Dipa Ma This session will invite us to reconnect with our inner compass by cultivating intuitive mindfulness-the blend of present-moment…

    Read More

  • Daily Meditation Recordings, with Caverly Morgan – Week of May 25

    We’re very grateful to have Caverly Morgan hosting our Daily Meditation Series for North America. To find out more about Caverly, and to view her past recordings and contributions to Sangha Live, click here. Monday, May 25 Releasing conditioned processes of suffering (part 3) Wednesday, May 27 Knowing awareness, experiencing being Friday, May 29 Embracing…

    Read More

  • Daily Meditation Recordings, with Catherine McGee – Week of April 25, 2022

    This week’s theme is “Exploring and Developing the Power of a Light Touch”. A light touch can allow our practice to unfold more easefully, make the depths of our hearts more available and create a greater agility in our relationships with the world. With our body as the primary ground for our practice we will explore different ways to cultivate this kind of attention, enjoy the fruits of our efforts and attend to what might hinder this natural capacity

    Read More

  • Zohar Lavie

    Daily Meditation Recordings, with Zohar Lavie – Week of July 17, 2023

    This week’s topic is “Deepening and Developing Unconditional Friendliness”. Metta, translated as unconditional friendliness, is a powerful and transformative attitude. When we relate to ourselves, others and experience with metta, reactivity and ill being dissolve and wisdom and wellbeing grow. During this week of practice we will deepen the practice and application of metta, as well as the understanding of how it impacts experience.

    Read More

  • Zohar Lavie

    Daily Meditation Recordings, with Zohar Lavie – Week of December 13, 2021

    This week’s theme is: A Bright Presence.

    Making an effort isn’t always easy; yet, how we show up really matters. Dharma teachings can help to enliven our sense of enthusiasm and energy on the path of practice. This week we’ll dive into different ways of engaging with our life, on the meditation seat and off. From soft delight to sustained dedication, let’s wake up fully with life — in life, and for life.

    Read More

  • Nirmala Werner

    The 9 Contemplations of Death – Feeling Safe with Impermanence

    In this talk and guided meditation, we turn toward the reality of impermanence with mindfulness and compassion. The Buddhist “Nine Contemplations of Death” invite us to meet our fear and denial with gentleness and honesty, remembering what truly matters. Rather than morbid, this reflection is a doorway into freedom—supporting us to live with integrity, presence,…

    Read More

  • Deborah Eden Tull - Senior Dharma Teacher

    Receptivity: Deep Listening as an Antidote to Reactivity and Violence

    In these hyped up divisive times, there is an ever-greater need for tools to de-condition ourselves from reactivity. The practice of listening – within ourselves and with others – is much more significant than we often acknowledge. The contrast of receptivity against the backdrop of a world conditioned to impose, label, judge, and solve, is…

    Read More